There are moments in your life when you think about what happened and contemplate with what you are going to do next. I’m sure that at certain point, you can’t seemed to accept what’s going on and felt hopeless about it.
I was diagnosed with depression and anxiety disorder back in January 2013. I could still recall that particular day when I first visited the doctor with my mother. It was an unexpected call for her to hear that diagnosis but for me, I was merely confirming what I had long thought of.
The shock was still intact with my mother and the rest of my family members as they could not see me — someone who was always cheerful and filled with laughter — to be depressed. Not knowing what caused my illness bothers them the most.
As for myself, I was unsure of the tipping point but it might be have been because of my past. I was puzzled as everything was fine and manageable before that moment. I might have been putting on a mask for my emotions but lost control because I can’t keep on going.
I might have not known the particular reasons for my depression and anxiety disorder but I am learning how to accept them. I don’t have the power to change what happened to me but I am confident of moving on with my life. Things have not been easy for me and when I look back, I am thankful for all those reasons that it happened.
I am grateful for those experience as I learned more about myself. I was able to get through the darkest time and come out as a survivor. It also taught me the important values of family, self-belief and love.
Now all I can say is that I am who I am for a lot of reasons and all I can do is to accept them with my heart.