What Do I Say?

What do I say to them? That all I want to do is to lie in bed and do nothing for the day.

What do I say to them? That I don’t even have the energy to care for my need.

What do I say to them? That the nights are the worse since the demons come out to play.

What do I say to them? That I want to feel the euphoria of the hellish torture as I bleed.

What do I say to them? That I want to fly with the angels and never see the light of day.

What do I say to them? That I assumed that they should have all along known.

What do I say to them? That I am not their sunshine of ray.

What do I say to them? That I want someone to be there for me but at the same time, I want them to leave me alone.

Because, at this moment, there is nothing that I could say to them that could make them understand the hell that I am in.

Advertisements

What does it mean to love yourself?

At times, others can mistake as being in a relationship as being loved. As being in a relationship shows that we are loved and desired by someone. But, loving yourself does not mean that you need to be in one.

Loving yourself at times means that you are fine with being single. As being alone does not necessarily that you are lonely. It just means you value your own company.

You can work on your weaknesses and make yourself a better person. You are able to devote your time to your hobbies and on yourself. You will learn things about yourself that you will not know when you are in a relationship.

You will start to learn what makes you tick, what makes your morning and what values are significant to you. Most importantly, you will start to learn to love yourself without the need of others loving you.

My Bucket List

Bucket List.

Definition: Some experiences or achievements that a person hopes to have or accomplish during their lifetime.

As the description stated, a bucket list is when someone lists out their hopes that they would want to achieve before they are oblivion to the world. It is rather cliché that we, as humans, need to list out the things we want to achieve in this lifetime but as cliché as it is, it is a necessity. It is an obligation for us to pen it down as we often get lost in the business of life, a hectic schedule that at times we are required to do rather than want to do as this is the nature of living. Thus, with that mentioned, this is mine bucket list.

I want to list out all the things that I would hope to accomplish some day. List of experiences that I know would be worth every penny that I am saving for especially when I am a frugal person. Hence, this is it:

  1. Published a book before I turn the age of 30.
  2. Go for a short overseas trip by myself.
  3. Travel to a foreign country with a group of close friends.
  4. Go backpacking with my younger brother.
  5. Start to gain some weight.
  6. Work overseas for a time.
  7. Continue studying to pursue my master’s
  8. Go skydiving.
  9. Try surfing.
  10. Go bungee jumping.
  11. Waterfall diving and canyoneering.
  12. Hike a mountain to the summit.
  13. Obstacle course.
  14. Zip line.
  15. Rock climbing.
  16. Extreme Swing.
  17. Perform live in front of an audience.
  18. Fly in the hot air balloon.
  19. Visit Venice.
  20. Attend a carnival.
  21. Try the Spartan Race.
  22. Finish the Marathon.
  23. Attend any type of festival.
  24. Abseil down a waterfall.
  25. Explore my small country – Singapore.

I do hope that I would be able to achieve the things I list out above. I will be adding things in the future and with updates on the things that I have done. I do hope that this list can be the beginning of me living life to the fullest.

Now, what are some of the things that you want to do?

Always and Forever

The times we had when we were little,
Is something I cherish till I’m old and brittle.
For what we were is something precious,
I am sure that it made others jealous.

Our relationship was full of affection,
We had each other’s back for our own protection.
Now that you both are tied to another,
I wish to remind you that we are always and forever.

Exhausted

The two hectic weeks had just passed.
It was hell while it last.
Three assignments and a test,
My body coped with that stressed.

Finally, done with all of this,
I could peacefully sleep in bliss.
As I know that purgatory is yet to come,
In the next few weeks, hoping not to crumb.

Every Muslims thought on the terror organisation; ISIS

In this currently day and age, we always heard something negative each time we turn up the news. Just in the last week of May 2017, there are a significant amount of occasions when a terror attacks happened such as the Kabul bombing, Manchester attack, Jakarta suicide-bombing and the latest tragedy; Resort World Manila attack. Having four terror attacks in one week showed the amount of hatred that mankind has towards their own kind.

Unsurprisingly, all these attacks were claimed by members of the Islamic State of Iraq and the Levant (ISIS). The terror organisation is responsible for 143 attacks in 29 countries which have killed 2,043 victims as of 13 February 2017 since they announced their caliphate in June 2014. The power that ISIS has over the world is truly terrifying that just mentioning their name can be heart-wrenching.

Unfortunately, the organisation branded themselves under Islam and promoting their actions as an act of the holy war. The war that they are trying to accomplish by banishing those who they deemed to be unholy to Allah and the prophet Muhammad. Thus, their actions itself have destroyed much innocence.

However, let it be known to the world that Muslims condone ISIS. Their actions and beliefs do not align with the rest of us. We, Muslims, know that they are filled with hatred. Their animosity is so intense that they thought their make-believe morals and values are right. When in fact, the religion did not preach such teachings to their followers. No religion in this world has such violence lessons as a religion is for the people to become a better embodiment of themselves.

Muslims do suffer the most in the actions of ISIS terror attacks. Their reputation is tainted by terrorism and the fear that the world has on Islam. Mostly, the prejudice that comes from the Western News Corporation in reporting this terrorism news. The discrimination against Muslims can even be seen with the Muslim Ban that President Donald Trump incorporated in January 2017.

Additionally, The United Nations (UN) reported in March 2016 that approximately 82 to 97 percent of Muslims are the victims of these terror attacks. At least 24,015 casualties were reported dead or injured in the first eight months of 2014 in Iraq. These numbers are not including the other neighbouring countries that are currently in the ISIS rule such as Syria, Yemen and Libya. These staggering numbers are usually not reported in the news as most news cooperation deemed it insignificant to their audience due to the far proximity from their country.

Hence, Muslim’s reputation has deteriorated due to ISIS’s imaginary holy war against the world. ISIS terror attacks have profoundly impacted the world safety and the reputation of Islam and Muslim. This is the time that people around the world need to come together as one to combat against terror attacks and these terror organisations. We need to show that united, we are stronger than these imposters. With that, this quote serves as a reminder to us all about terrorism: terrorism has no religion, terrorists have no religion, and they are friends to no religion – Manmohan Singh.

Labels

We live in a society where labels are consistently used to put people in categories so that one can easily box them up together. Not only that, but people also conform to these stereotypes that place them in those boxes so that they have a place in this society. A place that they could be comfortable, a place that they would feel a sense of belonging, a place that conforms to their ideas.

Recently, the question that I was asked the most is about my sexuality. This all boils down to the fact that I did not submit to neither of the community. People wanted to know for the sake of having a sense of idea about who I am and to put me in a box that belongs to all those concepts.

I don’t comply to the typical heterosexual male behaviours that society tends to place an idea about. Some of my attributes even contradict the fact that I am a straight male which others tend to question about even when I gave them the confirmation that I am. At times, it can get infuriating that they question who I am or try to place me in an abstract notion that they believe is right.

Labels that others try to put me on for their own understanding can be exhaustive. Trying to always prove a point wrong about yourself when you don’t need to can be damaging to your self-image and confidence. At times, I just wished to have the characteristics of a traditional heterosexual male so that they need not question. It would have been easier, it would have been better, it would have been simpler.

However, there is nothing that I could do that could make them change their perception of an ordinary straight male. As if I were to change my traits, it would be a betrayal of who I am and the journey that it took me to reach here today. Thus, all I am doing right now when they question my sexuality is to live by this quote: People are going to label you. It’s how you overcome those labels. That’s what matters. – One Tree Hill (Brooke Davis).